Board Thread:Internal management/@comment-7091122-20160511014707/@comment-7091122-20160511211026

Pinkgirl234 wrote: Several walls of text Hoo, boy...

"(Really, all of them)"

Listen. I've established this several times. I have crippling social anxiety, low functioning autism, I was previously depressed, and I think very lowly on myself. And that last one is based off what little I even know about myself. I hardly know who I am. And as of writing, end-of-school anxiety is hitting.

'''The tone you're using... Isn't going to help matters much. It isn't going to help AT ALL.'''

Seriously, you sound almost aggressive towards me. LIke you loathe and hate the mere concept of us having an Off-Topic branch, or at least redesigning General Discussion, the designated "Off-Topic" branch, to actually be, well, an Off-Topic branch.

And that's not even going into how I feel about how you seem to feel about me.

Seriously, last time I made a thread you opposed like this (and was ironically, a similar thread, in that people kept making blind assumptions and opposed it on that alone), you literally called me "not a real fan of PvZ."

How do you think that makes me feel? I've sank 30+ dollars into PvZ2, I've sank 300+ HOURS into the original PvZ, I literally GREW UP playing the games PopCap made for longer than I've been on the internet, and I've tried my best for the wiki. And because of one thing, you say I'm "not a real fan?" On top of EVERYTHING else that's occured in my life, between my crippling anxiety, my previous depression, and many other things?!

Seriously, how I'm even here is a plothole in the space-time continuum. It's almost a miracle I didn't resort to imaginary friends to have some companionsh-- OH WAIT! I ENDED UP DOING THAT, TOO! And I still kind of do! But that's another story.

And before you say "shouldn't you see a therapist?" like all the dozens of people I've heard say that, I've been doing that for 6 years. Done it since 2010, even. A therapist is not a magical cure for all your anxieties.

"Chat too fast-paced? Well there is nothing we can do if there are 30 - 40 users present in chat. Plus chat tends to die down from activity after a certain number of numbers. Ironically, you tried to run for chat moderator a few weeks ago."

That thread was made 2 weeks after I was Rollbacked. By the point I hit the time I could run again, I had already discarded the idea of being Chat Mod until I hit a better rate. Now I'd probably run for forum mod.

"Blogs too clunky? How in any way are they clunky?"

The comments. Unlike a forum, where there's no comment tree, and just a comment branch, making it easy to read, in blogs... You have comments. And replies to those comments. And replies to THOSE comments. And replies to THOSE comments. AND REP--

And when you have SEVERAL comments, that you want to have a discussion on...? You better pray to god that all the stars are right, the gods are in your favor, and everybody in the world feels merciful.

'In roleplaying, you are also allowed to engage in off-topic conversations at the same time. You normally do so by inserting such conversations in parenthesises or double slashes. '

And what if I don't want to participate in the RP itself? I'll look like a complete idiot, who literally made a character, doesn't ever use it, and just does the ((brackets all the freaking time to talk about other things!))

"And common sense too. As Someone456 mentioned, this is Plants vs. zombies Wiki. Additionally, you don't really or usually get scolded or reprimanded for posting in the wrong branch. Discussion moderators and administrators will simply move a thread to it's respective branch."

Of course it's the PvZ Wiki, but we have branches for that. So why is it that General Discussion is full of threads that don't belong, like at least a dozen threads about the wiki on the branch for general discussion instead of the PvZW branch, and a boatload of PvZ threads that are in General Discussion despite them going in other branches, and NONE of them are moved? Either people don't pay attention to it, or I'm missing something, and I probably am, to be honest.

"Dearie, there are billions of wikis out there that don't have the Off-topic branch. Does that also upset you?"

'''Do you expect me to speak for a billion communities, millions of which are likely dead? Because spoiler alert, that's physically impossible for me to do.''' I can't speak for if I'd want an off-topic branch for the forums on a wiki that's about some completely crude stuff like 4chan. But I guess that's called /b/ anyhow. However, for a community I am genuinely invested in joining, It'd be helpful.

That, and for being a community I want to join, you sure are not giving me good impressions...

"You know? You can list all your interests like the ones above you mentioned in your userpage."

And? '''How is this going to help me be social and talk about it? All it really does is throw topics in the air for me to use via the other means of communication that I personally dislike.''' That, do you expect me to approach some random person and talk about it? Like I said at the start, I'm incredibly socially anxious. I can NOT, I repeat, NOT start a conversation myself. At least, not without myself thinking to myself, at least once, some negative thought of how I've messed up. So how exactly am I going to get to know people better, when my method of topics relies entirely on someone stumbling upon my userpage, them MAGICALLY knowing some of the obscure stuff I like, and then having to use either an off-site or completely clunky communication on-site just to talk to them.

"This Forum of Wisdom will still be a forum even without the presence of an Off-Topic board. And this community is already together in several different ways."

'''You literally ignored at least the entire thread to say this. '''We have General Discussion, which is MEANT to be the OT branch, but it's poor naming and poor usage prevents anyone from using it like one. Not only that, but I am aware of the "several different ways" the community is "together."

The problem being, I don't like using any of the ones we have, and the most obvious one I'd use is being handled so poorly that people treat it like a dumb for PvZ or PvZW threads. I dare you, no, I double dare you! Find a thread on the General Discussion branch that is not about PvZ in any way (not about a planned fangame, not about our wiki in any way), is good enough to demand it's own thread (one guy sharing his facebook or his personal policies doesn't count), AND is about something you could discuss, like recent global events, or other fictional works with ZERO relation to PvZ whatsoever.

(And in conclusion.)

Do you really think I'm feeling good after having to write this, much less read what you said? Ask yourself, was using that tone you used a good idea for someone who is... well, I've said it enough, so I hope I don't have to repeat it.

Ironically, for being a Binding of Isaac player who previously had depression, I don't cry very easily. It takes something big for that to happen. And yet, the way you seemed so aggressive, so willing to put me down, eager disregard everyting I say, disregard everything I want, and disregard me, much less my feelings (whatever those are,) honestly made my eyes water a bit.

'''I want to join this community. I really do.''' Plenty of users here seem like nice people. But you...? Even though I know you can still change your ways, and I know you can still stop this sort of behavior...

You need to realize you hurt me. You have in the past by calling me "not a real PvZ fan" for trivial reasons, and you did again. And I'd like you to stop this behavior. As best as I can rationally say it these words, I need to say them: Please stop.

I even said in the promotion thread for rolback, AND my userpage, which you had to have gone to to even say some of these things, that people talking to me like the way you are right now hurts me on a mental level like few other things can.

And on my failed outdated chat mod thread, I mentioned that if it gets too much, I tend to lash out, albiet in an area where I can't actually harm anything I work or moderate. Do you think my 2 (yes, 2. I really have that few close friends I can go to in times of stress) friends I currently have are going to like knowing that I ended up lashing out, possibly even AT them, and that I had completely lost my sanity for a temporary amount of time, and even after it was done, I came back completely scarred for life? They'd be either incredibly anxious about my well being, and/or fuming that someone did this. And to know it'd be from you, on a wiki that they have ZERO experience with, other than I moderate the place, and yet I can't just report them because they're a higher staff position than I am? They'd probably lose it, and assume the entire wiki's like this. And I know it isn't.

I don't want to have to report you for something that is probably so pathetic and minute. I know it IS pathetic and minute to most people, and that it probably IS pathetic and minute in general. I know it won't end well, and that it probably won't even get anything done but make me look like a crybaby. It's happened a dozen times. Report someone doing something cruel, either nothing happens, or rarely "we'll think about it" and then nothing, or even more rarely, "we'll work on it" as they take FOREVER to do ANYTHING of valid use.

You probably haven't heard a word I've said, have you? You'll probably reply in another aggressive reply, talking about how you don't hate me, and that I'm just a sensitive brat... Like I haven't heard that before, from people who DID hate me...

'''But enough talk. '''If anything in this huge wall of text conclusion is something I want you to know, I want you to know this, and this alone. The rest of the stuff in this conclusion is just evidence, as far as I know or care. You've hurt my feelings. For me wanting to join the community, for me wanting so hard to help the wiki grow, to the point of me wanting to become STAFF, you've acted in a way that makes me feel unwanted as a whole. That my whole precense, and my ideas, are all stupid, unwanted, and whiny. And even when I establish, several times, mind you, that the way you are addressing this situation makes me upset, and you completely discard it, and given my whole life and situation mentally and socially...

It hurts to see that.

It hurts to know that.

It hurts.

...inb4 "ow the edge" comments...