User blog:GamerNerd i/Shady Dealings

If you're new to my writings, start here. If you don't need the exposition, start here. If you just want to see all the stuff, then it's in my user page.

I don’t think I was supposed to get these… But… er… Okay…?

Gnomish Message
To Mr. Dr. Edgar George Zomboss, and whomever else it may concern,

We have received your request for aid in combatting the specified dimensional intruders. While we are prevented from assisting you in person (due to the rulesy-rules of our High King Gnomus), lo-lo-lo and behold, we have some valuable-waluable information for you!

While the lady appears to have no weaknesses, ho-ho, does the lord have one! The malicious moons you acquired some time ago shall be most effective in countering this complication. When exposed, the boy shall become the beast. One of your allied assets should then be able to take over with mindy-mind control.

Should you require further elaborate elaboration, we are infinitely available in Infinity. Goody good luck to you!

Tra-la-la,

The Ministry of Mystery (M.O.M.)

Zombie Message
Dear Ministry,

Dr. Zomboss asked me to send his thanks and his regards. He is a busy man, and so the task of responding falls to me, Scientist, as his second-in-command.

Your aid is much appreciated. Dr. Zomboss, as he so painfully iterated in his initial letter, has been having much trouble with this duo. He seldom asks for help in military matters (and the one time that he did, he asked his future self).

Unfortunately, your information, while seemingly invaluable, is also quite cryptic. I understand that your unique manner of speaking translates into your writing, but it leaves much to be desired. Perhaps we could schedule a demonstration or other meeting for clarification?

Thank you again for your aid and understanding in this matter. Dr. Zomboss and I look forward to your response.

Sincerely,

Scientist, Second in command to Dr. Edgar George Zomboss